Welcome to your new home little Parker!

It is so good to get little Parker home!  And for us to be back home!  We had friends and family coming by to meet our new little bundle, bringing us meals and just loving on us.  Here are some of the pictures of our first few days at home.

I was very bright eyed after my first bath on Thursday night!  I get very alert during feeding times too!

I love my nap nanny!  It is one of my favorite places to sleep and I love to stretch out in it.  I eat every 3-3.5 hours and snooze in between for the most part.  When I came home from the hospital, I was eating about an 1-1.5 ounces but I have steadily increased over the past 9 days and as of March 8th, I am eating 3 ounces at every feeding.  I am eating Gerber Goodstart and have been doing great on it.  I do not spit up and I have no problem giving my mom and dad great burps. I went to the doctor and met Dr. Wheeler for the first time last Thursday, March 1st and really liked him.  I weighed 8 lbs, 3 oz which was what I weighed when I left the hospital (not really sure how much I lost due to them putting this silly cast on my leg).  Dr. Wheeler weighed me again on Monday, March 5th and I weighed 8 lbs, 6 oz so my mom said that is good!  I am such a good baby, I really do not cry.  I only whimper when I need a dry or clean diaper, I am hungry or I have a gas bubble.  My mommy started giving me Mylicon drops when I was about a week old and that has really helped my tummy.  My belly button cord fell off on Friday, March 2nd and that is healing great.  My little wee wee is still healing up but is almost all better but I have done great with that.  I haven’t lost any of my beautiful hair yet and my mom has been experimenting with different styles and products.  I got my new cast on Wednesday, March 7th and this one is red.  Mom says we have to see Dr. Wheeler next week for my 2-week check-up and that I have to get another new cast Wednesday afternoon so until then, I will keep hanging out and letting my parents love me to pieces!

Hospital Days

After Parker was born, we spent about an hour in the labor and delivery room with our birth mom and her mother.  Then we went down to the nursery and watched the nurses weigh and measure him, bathe him, do his footprints and all the other fun stuff they do in the newborn nursery.  Then my parents came up for a quick visit and brought all 4 of us some yummy food….our birth mom was craving some shrimp and we had promised her we would get her some as soon as it was all over!  So we all ate dinner and then Scott and I came home around 9 so everyone could get a good night’s sleep.

 

The next morning we were back at the hospital at 6:30am because Parker hadn’t seen a pediatrician yet and the nurses in the nursery told us to be there at that time so we wouldn’t miss the doctor.  Since the doctor didn’t come until around 7:15am, we got in some sweet snuggles.

 

The doctor said Parker was perfect (ha,ha…you can tell I am so biased already!) but seriously, said everything was looking great.  We did know that something was going on with his little foot and the doctor said he needed an ortho consult.  He was diagnosed with club foot and casted just a few hours later but I will let Scott did a Scott on that a little later. 

 

God has been so good during this whole process.  As you can see from the above pictures, we were kind of camping out in the corner of the nursery.  Well, after only an hour or so of this, the nurse over the nursery set us up in a private room!  Praise the Lord, what a blessing that was!  We were able to have a couple of visitors and even caught a nap during the day Tuesday.  It was also nice to have privacy during all our conversations because in an adoption, there are lots of social workers….in our case, we dealt with 3.  Here are some pictures from our stay.

 

Our birth mom signed her relinquishments on the 28th around 6pm and then we signed our placement papers around 12:30 on February 29, 2012….LEAP DAY!  We got discharged from the hospital around 1:30pm and got to head home to start our lives together with our sweet, precious gift!

a BIG recap and a BIG intro….

So our lives have been quite the roller coaster the last several months since my last blog post.  Once we got on the agency’s waiting list, the hard part started.  We were presented with situations (lots!) that because they weren’t God’s “Plan A” for our lives, didn’t work out.  Long days, emotional days…..led us to February 13th when we got “THE CALL”!!!!

 

We had just gotten back home from a quick weekend trip to Pigeon Forge with my family.  On the drive up Friday (February 10th) , we learned that we were one of 7 families who was interested in a little African American boy whose due date was February 23, 2012.  Everything about the situation sounded good but we were trying to manage our expectations since we had just had about 7 or 8 not work out in the three weeks prior alone.  On Monday, I was headed to a closing when our social worker Tricia called and said the birthmother had chosen us and wanted to meet the next morning at 9am.  I was on cloud 9 and was so glad I had the privilege to call my husband and tell him he was going to be a dad! 

 

The next day was Valentine’s Day, Tuesday February 14th, and we set out to the Columbia Bethany Christian Services office to meet with the birthmother.  It was clear during our meeting that this was the situation that God had designed for us.  She is such a mature, lovely young lady who is so brave and courageous to make such a loving plan of adoption for her son.  We decided to meet again on Friday so that we could meet with her mother.Friday came and that meeting went great as well.  Her mother was just as pleasant as she was and it only solidified that this was right.  The date of this meeting was the 17th and our due date was the 23rd so time was drawing near! 

 

Our birthmother had invited me to her OB appointment that was scheduled for Thursday, February 23rd if she didn’t go into labor on her own.  I attended this appointment with her and was able to hear the baby’s strong heart beat and saw him moving in her belly….what a miracle to see!  I couldn’t wait to tell Scott that she was dilated 3 cm so we decided to have everything ready in the car because the doctor seemed to think she could deliver sometime over the weekend.  I also hit the stores to stock up on some sweet little boy clothes since we had none.  We were so busy those days leading up to everything getting the house prepared, sterilizing bottles, washing clothes and linens and getting ready to welcome a precious little baby.

It rained all the day the following day (Friday the 24th) so I just knew she’d deliver that day.  If you know us well, you know it rained on our wedding day so I just figured of course our baby would be born on a rainy day too!  Well….no baby came that day but we did get more accomplished, some attorney stuff done, etc.  I even slept in my makeup that night just knowing we would get a call in the middle of the night.  Well, no baby.  In fact, no baby came Saturday or Sunday either.  Apparently, our son was going to be patient little guy.  We went to bed Sunday like normal, Scott was planning on going to work Monday morning but then….THE CALL came at 2:28am from our birthmother’s social worker Lisa.  She said to head to the hospital so we did!  Only an hour passed from the time the call came until the time we got inside the hospital and we were ready!

 

Then more waiting came!  Our birthmother’s contractions were still about 5 minutes apart and her water hadn’t broken yet.  The doctors weren’t sure they were going to keep her or not.  Finally, around 6am they said they were going to deliver a baby that day….but the waiting had really just begun!   This is where I discovered she had no intention of receiving an epidural (oh my!).  Did I mention she invited me to be in the delivery room through the whole thing?  Yes she did!  But then I was scared when I heard this news but I just prayed God would help us through it.  At 9:45am, the doctor broke her water and her contractions began to come every 2-3 minutes and we were at 5cm.  Then in the early afternoon, we got to 8 cm but unfortunately stalled there for a few hours.  After much discussion, her doctor advised her into an epidural around 4:50pm and at 5pm, she was 10cm and ready to push.  I did help her the entire labor by counting contractions, holding her hand, placing the wet wash cloth on her forehead, etc. and when the time came to cut the cord, I did do it (no matter that I normally have the weakest stomach ever)!  By the way…did I mention it was raining all day while we were at the hospital in labor and delivery?

 

At 5:21pm on Monday, February 27, 2012, Parker Porter Wilbert entered the world at 7 pounds, 14 ounces and 19 inches long and our hearts rejoiced!

 

We are approved!!

So we have good news….Scott and I are finally finished with the home study and we have been approved!  We got the official word about a week and a half ago that we were now on our agency’s official waiting list but we wanted to make sure everything was completed before we announced it on here.  But now everything is signed so HOORAY!!!

 

You have to understand our excitement because we have been waiting since April to get to this point.  Typically, it does not take this long but Scott and I have unfortunately met delay after delay during our process.  Just to give you an idea of what a “normal” timeline looks like…..our friends who went through training with us which we all completed back at the end of June finished their home study in July and got put on the waiting list, actually got matched with a birthmother after only 12 days (crazy fast!) and brought their precious baby home in August.  Now their matching and placement was super fast (which would be extremely nice ) but usually the home study takes about 2 weeks which it did in their case.  Ours started at the beginning of August and ended at the end of October.  WOW!  I never thought it would end.  I had good days and bad days during that time but I prayed without ceasing for God’s comfort and peace that His timing was perfect.  I will admit it was hard during those weeks and months to see other families get placed with children but I know God has hand selected the perfect child for Scott and me and that is going to be worth the wait.

 

At this stage of the game, things could happen at any time.  Sometimes there is a phone call where they ask you to pick up your child within 24-48 hours.  Other times, you may get selected by a birthmother who doesn’t deliver for another month or so.  Please pray for us.  Pray that we will seek God’s wisdom.  Pray that we will have continued patience.  Pray for our strength as we go through this roller coaster of a time in our lives.  Pray for our child and for our child’s birthmother.  Most importantly, pray that God’s Will be done.

 

Thank you so much for all your support!  Also, if you know anyone who is thinking of making an adoption plan for their child, please remember us.  Our profile is at http://waitingfamilies.bethany.org/home/South-carolina .  If you scroll down, it is under “Scott and Lauren.”

 

Lauren

It is all about God’s timing

Well, we’ve hit a little delay.  When we started our home study at the beginning of August, we thought we’d be on the waiting list by the end of the month.  We were delayed in the middle of August by an oversight and thought we’d absolutely be on the the waiting list by now.  But we’re not.  And that is ok.  It is now looking like our home study will not be complete for another month so we probably won’t be on the waiting list until the end of October.  We started this process in April so as it stands right now, it looks like it is going to take us about 7 months to make it to the official waiting list.  Have I mentioned what a process adoption is?  It is not for the faint of heart but man oh man I can’t wait for the blessing that is coming at the end of this road!

 

As I have told you before, God has been teaching us so many things along this journey and I have no doubt that this is just a part of His plan.  All of this in His timing and I have had to learn that sometimes God works through delays.  Before we learned about the length of our delay, we attended our church (Lake Murray Baptist Church) Sunday and heard an incredible message about how God works through tragedy.  With Sunday marking the 10th anniversary of the attacks of 9/11, our pastor focused on how God knew what was going to happen and how he loves us and being fully God and fully man, he knows how we feel when we go through hard times.  He also referenced the death of Lazarus and how God was able to work through a delay in allowing him to die and then raising him up from the dead so that people would see the glory of God and be drawn to Him even though they had to go through a few days of sadness.  I believe that God is sovereign and sometimes he works through delays.  I believe God never leaves us and is working through our tragedies.  I feel like my biggest “tragedy” to date is knowing I will not be able to have children.  God knew that was going to be part of my story of life and yet he still allowed it to happen.  I have been very sad and confused why God chose for this to happen to me.  But I can tell you that over these last few months, He is using all of that to make me rely on Him more and trust in His plan for my life.  Even this delay we have hit this week, I know it is all part of our plan and I ask that you pray that God will continue to provide us with the strength and comfort we will need as we continue this journey. 

 

This week has also been a very reflective week in terms of mine and Scott’s marriage.  Two years ago, Scott and I were in marriage counseling on the verge of the nasty D word I don’t like to say.  Praise God that He performed an absolute miracle in our marriage and that it is stronger now than it has ever been.  He is the God of restoration and the teacher of forgiveness.  I praise God for molding my husband into such a wonderful leader of our home and thank Him for humbling me and teaching me how to be a godly wife.  Even through the stress of this home study (which by the way, the devil has tried his best to try and come between us), I am so proud that we have stood together as a team and not fallen into what the devil’s desires were and stood strong, trusting God, with each day.  I can’t wait to see Scott holding our precious little one….he is going to be such an awesome dad!

 

We are heading to the first home game of the season Saturday so GO COCKS!!!

 

Lauren

Adoption, Foster Parenting and Reconciliation

Most of you know how strongly I feel about adoption.  Others of you may not be as aware of the large burden God has laid on my heart for foster children.  Scott and I are praying for God to show us where he wants us, how he wants to use us and how best He can use us to minister to the world of foster care.  The above link is a podcast from a sermon delivered in August by our pastor, Rob Tims, at Lake Murray Baptist Church.  Rob and his wife, along with their 2 sons, had care of 2 precious little girls through foster care.  Through this experience, he realized that sometimes God is able to do his work through reconciliation and not necessarily through adoption.  Please take the time and listen and pray how God may use you to be His hands and feet when it comes to caring for these precious children.

 

http://www.lakemurraybaptist.org/media.php?pageID=26

Then click on the 3rd sermon titled: Foster Care - A Ministry of Reconciliation

Slacker City!

I can’t believe it has been just over a month since I updated this.  I feared this would happen when I started it but I am going to try and commit to do better.  What’s been going on with us the last month?  Well, we did get back from New York safely after a quick trip, I took a few days of vacay with my mom to the beach, , I sewed a lot of cute things, we had a lovely baby shower with great friends, GAMECOCK football has started (woo, woo!), we had another successful garage sale day, Scott’s cousin Casey came and stayed over Labor Day weekend, I had surgery yesterday and our nursery is actually starting to look like a place where a child may sleep at night

 

As you can tell, we’ve been busy!  I can say that I am actually excited to be waking up to temperatures in the 60s and actually enjoying being outside again!  Fall is always one of my favorite times of year because of college football.  I also get excited thinking that this will probably be our last summer as a “party of 2”.  YAY! 

 

So there really is no big update on our adoption status.  We are still trying to finish up our home study and are hoping to have that done in the next couple of weeks.  I will not lie, this last month has been hard, REALLY hard.  I had no idea how difficult the home study portion would be.  Our agency told us upfront that adoption was hard and that at times we may doubt or become discouraged and I can say I have felt less than stellar these past few weeks (probably why there has not been any posts).  For those of you who are not very familiar with adoptions, the home study is not just about how your house looks or what type of neighborhood you live in.  During the home study, they are actually studying you and learning EVERYTHING about you.  I may have already said this in an earlier blog but I seriously think the only thing they don’t know is probably my shoe size.  We have been asked very personal questions that have required us to be painfully honest and open up to essentially a stranger about very private issues.  I have been very frustrated, very sad, very impatient and just mad at times.  I have found myself asking, “Why do I have to go through this?”  Being able to not have children biologically is hard enough and now I feel like I am being critiqued as to whether or not I will be a good parent.  I continue to look to God and trust Him through all of this.  I keep reminding myself that His timing is perfect.  I am so thankful that God is the author of my life and that he writes perfect stories according to His Will.  I cannot wait to see our story unfold….

 

I am at home today recovering from yesterday’s surgery but once I feel like myself again, I will snap a few pics of the nursery and post a few     Thank you to my wonderful hubby for doing such a great job painting it!

 

I hope your day is a great one and that you are enjoying this beautiful weather as much as I am!

 

Lauren

On the road again…

Today is a travel day.  We left Lexington at 5am this morning to drive straight to upstate New York to see Scott’s family.  The unfortunate part is we are driving it back straight on Monday…2 days of traveling for 2 days of visiting.  Have I mentioned I don’t travel well or that I am prone to car sickness……

 

We had our first visit of our home study yesterday with our social worker Tricia.  She went ahead and scheduled the remaining 3 visits and she said her hope is that we would be live on the web site by the end of August.  YAY!  This excites me very much.  If we get on the official waiting list at the end of August, that will be the 4 month mark from when we started this journey.  After we are “live”, birthmothers will be able to look at our family profile as well as our photo book and our YouTube video.  I literally know people that have only been “live” 10 days prior to being matched with a birthmother and others that have waited for over a year.  It is all in the Lord’s hands and we trust His timing will be perfect.

 

On another note, the children’s shelter that I work at has opened up a ministry opportunity to our Sunday school class.  We are going to be taking meals over once a month and have a time of games and fellowship afterwards.  Our first time going was last night and it was a blast.  Since the house parents are away on vacation, we actually get to do it once a week for 3 weeks   The kids absolutely love it and look forward to meeting new faces and having fun!

 

Have a great Friday and a great weekend!
Lauren

Weekend of Wonderful!

This past weekend was super busy but great!  We had our second garage sale Saturday morning and raised $593!  Woo Hoo!!!  We are planning our next sale for mid-late August.

 

We attended our Sunday School social at Justin and Holly Love’s house.  It was a wonderful fiesta filled with lots of great food and awesome people.  I am just amazed like our class is only 1 year old and has grown from 4 couples to now 15!!  Seriously an amazing God thing.

 

Sunday we had a great message from Rob Tims at Lake Murray Baptist Church and then I had my first baby shower in the afternoon.  I am so blessed to have so much support from such wonderful family and friends.  My aunt Donna’s house looked great and the fellowship was wonderful.  And the gifts were so sweet!  Baby Wilbert got lots of goodies from a Bumbo, little loveys, fun books and toys, car gear, gift certificates (will come in handy for the bedding!) and many other awesome things! 

 

We also got most of our furniture in on Thursday.  We have set up the crib and the dresser/hutch and are just waiting on the chest of drawers.  I must say that I LOVE the furniture.  It is a dark espresso finish and it will look even better once I get to buy bedding

 

UPDATE:  Our home study is about to start!  Our first meeting is Thursday morning!  YAY!  I am very excited to get this underway so then we can be “live” on the web site.  Our social worker said to plan on about 2-3 weeks to have everything complete with the home study. 

 

I am off to work now….got 1 contract negotiated over the weekend, still negotiating another and taking out a first time homebuyer this afternoon.  What a great job!

 

Happy Monday!
Lauren