It is all about God’s timing

Well, we’ve hit a little delay.  When we started our home study at the beginning of August, we thought we’d be on the waiting list by the end of the month.  We were delayed in the middle of August by an oversight and thought we’d absolutely be on the the waiting list by now.  But we’re not.  And that is ok.  It is now looking like our home study will not be complete for another month so we probably won’t be on the waiting list until the end of October.  We started this process in April so as it stands right now, it looks like it is going to take us about 7 months to make it to the official waiting list.  Have I mentioned what a process adoption is?  It is not for the faint of heart but man oh man I can’t wait for the blessing that is coming at the end of this road!

 

As I have told you before, God has been teaching us so many things along this journey and I have no doubt that this is just a part of His plan.  All of this in His timing and I have had to learn that sometimes God works through delays.  Before we learned about the length of our delay, we attended our church (Lake Murray Baptist Church) Sunday and heard an incredible message about how God works through tragedy.  With Sunday marking the 10th anniversary of the attacks of 9/11, our pastor focused on how God knew what was going to happen and how he loves us and being fully God and fully man, he knows how we feel when we go through hard times.  He also referenced the death of Lazarus and how God was able to work through a delay in allowing him to die and then raising him up from the dead so that people would see the glory of God and be drawn to Him even though they had to go through a few days of sadness.  I believe that God is sovereign and sometimes he works through delays.  I believe God never leaves us and is working through our tragedies.  I feel like my biggest “tragedy” to date is knowing I will not be able to have children.  God knew that was going to be part of my story of life and yet he still allowed it to happen.  I have been very sad and confused why God chose for this to happen to me.  But I can tell you that over these last few months, He is using all of that to make me rely on Him more and trust in His plan for my life.  Even this delay we have hit this week, I know it is all part of our plan and I ask that you pray that God will continue to provide us with the strength and comfort we will need as we continue this journey. 

 

This week has also been a very reflective week in terms of mine and Scott’s marriage.  Two years ago, Scott and I were in marriage counseling on the verge of the nasty D word I don’t like to say.  Praise God that He performed an absolute miracle in our marriage and that it is stronger now than it has ever been.  He is the God of restoration and the teacher of forgiveness.  I praise God for molding my husband into such a wonderful leader of our home and thank Him for humbling me and teaching me how to be a godly wife.  Even through the stress of this home study (which by the way, the devil has tried his best to try and come between us), I am so proud that we have stood together as a team and not fallen into what the devil’s desires were and stood strong, trusting God, with each day.  I can’t wait to see Scott holding our precious little one….he is going to be such an awesome dad!

 

We are heading to the first home game of the season Saturday so GO COCKS!!!

 

Lauren

Adoption, Foster Parenting and Reconciliation

Most of you know how strongly I feel about adoption.  Others of you may not be as aware of the large burden God has laid on my heart for foster children.  Scott and I are praying for God to show us where he wants us, how he wants to use us and how best He can use us to minister to the world of foster care.  The above link is a podcast from a sermon delivered in August by our pastor, Rob Tims, at Lake Murray Baptist Church.  Rob and his wife, along with their 2 sons, had care of 2 precious little girls through foster care.  Through this experience, he realized that sometimes God is able to do his work through reconciliation and not necessarily through adoption.  Please take the time and listen and pray how God may use you to be His hands and feet when it comes to caring for these precious children.

 

http://www.lakemurraybaptist.org/media.php?pageID=26

Then click on the 3rd sermon titled: Foster Care - A Ministry of Reconciliation

Slacker City!

I can’t believe it has been just over a month since I updated this.  I feared this would happen when I started it but I am going to try and commit to do better.  What’s been going on with us the last month?  Well, we did get back from New York safely after a quick trip, I took a few days of vacay with my mom to the beach, , I sewed a lot of cute things, we had a lovely baby shower with great friends, GAMECOCK football has started (woo, woo!), we had another successful garage sale day, Scott’s cousin Casey came and stayed over Labor Day weekend, I had surgery yesterday and our nursery is actually starting to look like a place where a child may sleep at night

 

As you can tell, we’ve been busy!  I can say that I am actually excited to be waking up to temperatures in the 60s and actually enjoying being outside again!  Fall is always one of my favorite times of year because of college football.  I also get excited thinking that this will probably be our last summer as a “party of 2”.  YAY! 

 

So there really is no big update on our adoption status.  We are still trying to finish up our home study and are hoping to have that done in the next couple of weeks.  I will not lie, this last month has been hard, REALLY hard.  I had no idea how difficult the home study portion would be.  Our agency told us upfront that adoption was hard and that at times we may doubt or become discouraged and I can say I have felt less than stellar these past few weeks (probably why there has not been any posts).  For those of you who are not very familiar with adoptions, the home study is not just about how your house looks or what type of neighborhood you live in.  During the home study, they are actually studying you and learning EVERYTHING about you.  I may have already said this in an earlier blog but I seriously think the only thing they don’t know is probably my shoe size.  We have been asked very personal questions that have required us to be painfully honest and open up to essentially a stranger about very private issues.  I have been very frustrated, very sad, very impatient and just mad at times.  I have found myself asking, “Why do I have to go through this?”  Being able to not have children biologically is hard enough and now I feel like I am being critiqued as to whether or not I will be a good parent.  I continue to look to God and trust Him through all of this.  I keep reminding myself that His timing is perfect.  I am so thankful that God is the author of my life and that he writes perfect stories according to His Will.  I cannot wait to see our story unfold….

 

I am at home today recovering from yesterday’s surgery but once I feel like myself again, I will snap a few pics of the nursery and post a few     Thank you to my wonderful hubby for doing such a great job painting it!

 

I hope your day is a great one and that you are enjoying this beautiful weather as much as I am!

 

Lauren

On the road again…

Today is a travel day.  We left Lexington at 5am this morning to drive straight to upstate New York to see Scott’s family.  The unfortunate part is we are driving it back straight on Monday…2 days of traveling for 2 days of visiting.  Have I mentioned I don’t travel well or that I am prone to car sickness……

 

We had our first visit of our home study yesterday with our social worker Tricia.  She went ahead and scheduled the remaining 3 visits and she said her hope is that we would be live on the web site by the end of August.  YAY!  This excites me very much.  If we get on the official waiting list at the end of August, that will be the 4 month mark from when we started this journey.  After we are “live”, birthmothers will be able to look at our family profile as well as our photo book and our YouTube video.  I literally know people that have only been “live” 10 days prior to being matched with a birthmother and others that have waited for over a year.  It is all in the Lord’s hands and we trust His timing will be perfect.

 

On another note, the children’s shelter that I work at has opened up a ministry opportunity to our Sunday school class.  We are going to be taking meals over once a month and have a time of games and fellowship afterwards.  Our first time going was last night and it was a blast.  Since the house parents are away on vacation, we actually get to do it once a week for 3 weeks   The kids absolutely love it and look forward to meeting new faces and having fun!

 

Have a great Friday and a great weekend!
Lauren

Weekend of Wonderful!

This past weekend was super busy but great!  We had our second garage sale Saturday morning and raised $593!  Woo Hoo!!!  We are planning our next sale for mid-late August.

 

We attended our Sunday School social at Justin and Holly Love’s house.  It was a wonderful fiesta filled with lots of great food and awesome people.  I am just amazed like our class is only 1 year old and has grown from 4 couples to now 15!!  Seriously an amazing God thing.

 

Sunday we had a great message from Rob Tims at Lake Murray Baptist Church and then I had my first baby shower in the afternoon.  I am so blessed to have so much support from such wonderful family and friends.  My aunt Donna’s house looked great and the fellowship was wonderful.  And the gifts were so sweet!  Baby Wilbert got lots of goodies from a Bumbo, little loveys, fun books and toys, car gear, gift certificates (will come in handy for the bedding!) and many other awesome things! 

 

We also got most of our furniture in on Thursday.  We have set up the crib and the dresser/hutch and are just waiting on the chest of drawers.  I must say that I LOVE the furniture.  It is a dark espresso finish and it will look even better once I get to buy bedding

 

UPDATE:  Our home study is about to start!  Our first meeting is Thursday morning!  YAY!  I am very excited to get this underway so then we can be “live” on the web site.  Our social worker said to plan on about 2-3 weeks to have everything complete with the home study. 

 

I am off to work now….got 1 contract negotiated over the weekend, still negotiating another and taking out a first time homebuyer this afternoon.  What a great job!

 

Happy Monday!
Lauren

What does the Bible say about adoption?

John Piper on Adoption

 

 

Thank you God for your grace and for choosing me to be one of your children and adopting me into your family for eternity.  I pray your will be done in mine and Scott’s adoption.  Let it all be for your glory!

Beautiful children

Happy Wednesday!  What a beautiful sunny day it is today….where was this yesterday when I went to the water park in Charleston with the kids from the children’s shelter?  We were literally freezing….like chill bumps and everything because it was cold and rainy.  We picked them up early yesterday morning and I didn’t get home until almost 10 but I had LOTS of fun! 

 

This summer, I have learned so much about DSS and the way “the system” works.  More than anything though, I have been blessed by the beautiful children who are there.  This summer we started out with 13 children and through the weeks, some have left, others have come and as of today, there are 7.  Each one of them has been very special to me and God has truly touched me in a very real way as I have talked with them and built relationships.  These children come from homes that I cannot imagine or circumstances I cannot fathom.  I praise God that He gave me such wonderful parents who always loved and supported me throughout my upbringing and still in adulthood.  I just want to be that solid figure for these children.  I just want them to know that I am here for them, I love them and they can trust me.  I am super excited to continue working closely with the shelter even after the summer ends

 

I have asked Scott to begin praying with me about being open to being foster parents down the road.  I do not think it is in God’s plan for us to do this tomorrow, or even next year but I do feel He has given me such a burden for these beautiful children and I will continue to pray His will be done in my life, in whatever way He decides.

 

We don’t have any new developments in our adoption as of right now….hoping to start the home study next week!

 

Lauren

Blessings

Happy Sunday!  So glad we got to go to church this morning and praise God.  Today in Sunday School and in worship, we were reminded how Jesus is all we need.  God is the creator and the ruler of all things and I am so glad I serve a living Lord.  We should follow Christ not because our lives will be better if we do or because he will provide us with material things, but because we are called to be followers of Christ and to do everything for His glory.  My prayer for our adoption is that Christ will be the center and that all that happens will be for His glory. 
 
Everything that happens in our lives is for God’s glory, even if we don’t understand it while it is happening or possibly even while we are on Earth.  This was so hard for me to understand as I was grieving the “loss” of not being able to have biological children.  One of my dear friends told me to listen to the song “Blessings” by Laura Story.  I will be honest and say I didn’t listen to it for a couple of months later but when I did, it was exactly what I needed to be reminded of. 

Blessings by Laura Story

“We pray for blessings, we pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while You hear each spoken need
Yet love is way too much to give us lesser things

And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You're near?
And what if trials of this life
Are Your mercies in disguise?
When friends betray us, when darkness seems to win
We know that pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home
It's not our home

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears?
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You're near?
What if trials of this life
Are Your mercies in disguise?

We pray for wisdom, Your voice to hear
We cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
And all the while You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears?


'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears?
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You're near?

What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst
This world can't satisfy?
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise?


Lauren

For I know the plans I have for you....

Hey y'all!  Hope everyone has had a good weekend so far.  Unfortunately, mine started out a little rocky yesterday.  I was out showing clients some lake homes in Prosperty and everything was going fabulous until....I decided to try a 3-point turn in a narrow driveway and found myself stuck (in the Yukon) on a metal stake.  I guess I turned the wheel just right and the steel rod (that I later discovered with "marking" a water valve) went in by the wheel and proceeded to pull apart my bumper.  The sad part was I didn't realize this was happening and I took off more than half the bumper.  I had to get a tow (not fun) and found out Onstar only tows 20 miles which is interesting when you are in the middle of the sticks.  After a lot of phone calls and back and forth, we figured it all out and had a local body shop look at the car.  Let's just say next week I was be visiting Farm Bureau's claim center because it is more out of pocket than we can afford!

On another completely different note, God is amazing!!!  He has and is continuing to teach me so many things.  There have been many times I was able to look back on a situation and see how God's hand was all in it but I must say that over the past few months, He has worked out so much for us and we can clearly see it is all Him.  It started off back in the spring when God changed Scott's heart regarding adoption.  I am so thankful that my husband has a growing relationship with the Lord and that he has allowed God to mold and shape him.  As we begin discussing adoption, money was one of the first things we were forced to discuss.  Back around the end of March, beginning of April, Scott was presented with a new job opportunity.  For those of you who don't know, Scott is a physical therapist.  This job seemed like a great opportunity and a huge plus was that is was literally not even 5 minutes from our house, much better than his 25-35 minute commute to Columbia.  The new job meant an increase in pay as well which was great!  Scott submitted a resignation letter to his current employer because he felt that there was no way his current employer could come close to the package he was offered.  Well we were wrong!  They actually were able to meet it and even offer better bonuses which was wonderful news and a huge relief for us financially!  Also, he got his vacation time upped to 4 weeks paid time off which will come in handy once we finally get "the call".

I know everyone is aware that the real estate market is not what it was and my income has been affected by the drop in the economy since I am 100% commission.  But again, God is bigger than any recession.  April started off with no contracts, no pending deals, nothing.  During April, I was able to write 1 contract, then 2 contracts.....and byy the end of the month, I had 5 deals waiting to close.  As of today, all of those have closed except 1 (set to close mid August) and I praise God that He has allowed us to bank the majority of those funds for our adoption!  He is continuing to provide by bringing new buyers and sellers my way and I am so glad He is in control of my business.

Isn't this so exciting??  Well the next thing I wanted to share with y'all came in May.  As most of you know, I am a very social person.  I have always tried to be a very honest, genuine person and I have never been scared about opening up and being real with people.  As we begin this journey to adoption, I was talking to my friends and family about my fears, worries, excitement, etc. but no one could truly understand because they had not been down that road before.  Well, Scott and I walked into our first meeting with Bethany and as soon as I walk in the door I hear "Hey Lauren!"  I was so relieved and happy to look up and see a friend who I have known since high school that was also there with her husband for the meeting.  Since then, she has been such a blessing in my life.  I thank God for providing me with a friend who I can talk to who completely understands what I am feeling and for giving me with this special friendship. 

Seriously, I am smiling now as I write this.  The NEXT  thing that happened in my life that has totally solidified to me that God is ALL over this was when an opportunity was presented to me to be the co-director of summer activities for a local children's shelter.  This has been the most heart changing experience I have been through ever.  Words will not be able to truly express how much this experience has meant to me.  On a weekly basis, I have been able to go 3-4 outings per week with these precious children.  We have done everything from swimming parties to water parks to movies to riding horses and I LOVE IT!  I never would have been able to commit this much time to the children if I was working 50 plus hours a week like I was doing just a few short years ago.  I do believe God gives us all different spiritual gifts and talents. I firmly believe that God has given me a heart for children and for ministering to children.  This opportunity has also given me a chance to be around children of all different races, backgrounds and ages.  We are very open in terms of our adoption preferences so I have been grateful to learn some new things this summer in the event we are blessed with a child of a different race.  I have learned how to fix every little girl's hair (completely hilarious in the beginning!), being ashy is not cool and everyone needs sunscreen :)  No doubt, God put me in this position for this time so He could reveal so many lessons to me in a very real way and I hope to continue working with the shelter for a long time!

Sorry this post ended up being so long but I really wanted to share just how great God is!  I am so excited to see His plan unfold and to see how He will continue to use Scott and I for His glory.  Please pray that Scott and I will continue to seek His will first and that we will put all of our faith and hope in Him on a daily basis. 

I pray you see God's blessings and hand in your life!

Lauren

Adoption Garage Sale

I decided July 7th over lunch with Scott that we should have a garage sale to raise money to help fund our adoption.  To be honest, we had SO much in our house that we needed to get rid of in order to make room for the baby.  Then, the idea expanded right before we parted ways that day to head back to work.  I thought it might not be a bad idea to ask our family and friends if they had anything they needed to get rid of that they might consider allowing us to sell in our garage sale.  We put word out that afternoon and the response was overwhelming!

God provided so many items through our precious friends and family.  I will never be able to truly say how grateful and thankful I am for everyone's generosity.  We had our first garage sale last Saturday on the 16th.  We were able to sell some items via Facebook during the week leading up to the sale as well.  By lunchtime on the 16th, God has provided almost $1,500!!!!

We are planning another garage sale next Saturday, July 30th and then hopefully another one in the middle of August.  If you feel led to donate any "junk", Scott and I are more than willing to bring over a trailer and pick up anything you may be willing to give.

God has been walking with Scott and I so closely during this process.  He has revealed himself in so many ways already (I will write a separate blog on that soon).  Last week was such a humbling and overwhelming experience.  I told Scott we might make a couple of hundred dollars so you can imagine how we felt when the money was counted.  God is so good and he is forever faithful!

Have a wonderful Friday!

Lauren

And it begins...

I decided to start this blog as a way to document our journey to starting our family through adoption.  For those of you who do not know, I was diagnosed back in 2009 with a neurological condition.  Basically, it is a "false brain tumor" that causes all the symptoms of a true tumor.  It is currently under control but any changes in my hormones could cause it to come back, possibly more severely than before, with the possibility of loosing my vision.  After years of prayer, doctor's recommendations and thousands of hard, emotional conversations, Scott and I decided back in April that we would pursue an adoption to grow our family.

Now the exciting news!  We filled out our initial application with Bethany Christian Services back in April and attended our first, informational meeting with them in May.  Shortly after that first meeting, we both decided that Bethany was the agency for us so we filled out our formal application at the end of May.  June was filled with LOTS of paperwork, medical exams, fingerprinting and more paperwork.  At the end of June, we attended another training with Bethany.  Since that training, we have been putting together our profile, photo books and YouTube video.  The next step will be our home study which will begin in another few weeks.  The home study generally takes about 2-3 weeks.  After that is completed, we will be up on the Bethany web site and will be waiting for "the call."

For those of you who are not familiar with adoption, I would love to share with you a little (a lot!) of what I have learned.  Scott and I are pursuing a domestic, infant adoption.  We have kind of been "jumping through the hoops" up until this point but as soon as our home study is finished, that is when the really exciting part begins.  We will have an online profile (kind of ironic for us considering we met through an online dating service) with a letter to the birthmother, pictures of us and a link to watch a short YouTube video that will give a little more insight into us, our family, hobbies, etc.  Bethany Christian Services actually allows the expectant mother to select the adoptive family....I was completely floored by this because I just thought the social workers matched you up and you worked your way up a waiting list.  But since it is not that way, the timeframe is anyone's guess.  It could be weeks after we go up on the site or months or possibly even a year.  Our social worker has prepared us that the average family's process start to finish takes about a year.  Once an expectant mother picks us, our agency will contact us and give us as much information as possible about the situation.  From there, we will be able to pray over the situation and decide if it is something we are comfortable with.  If it does not sound right, then we will stay on the web site.  If it does, then we move forward.  This may mean actually meeting the expectant mother if that is something she desires or just waiting for placement.  If you haven't picked up on it by now, everything varies and every situation is different.  We are at peace with this and know that God has already designed a plan for us. 

We are so excited to see His plan unfold as we continue on this journey.  We ask that you pray alongside us for our birthmother, our future baby and for our family.  Please pray for patience for us and that God will provide us the strength and comfort that we will need during the waiting period.  We have already seen his hand at work in getting us to this place and even in the few short months since this journey began.  I am humbled and amazed at how AMAZING our God is!  We appreciate all of your thoughts and prayers and can't wait to update you as the journey continues...